Everyday I miss my Dad, but some days are worse than others.
Today, I miss him a lot!
It was Trick or Treating day here-and I would love to have had him here to come trick or treating with us. That's something he never got to do.
I remember as a kid, he took us...walked along on the sidewalk-just hanging out...laughing at all the crazy costumes.
My kids were cute today. Collin was Thomas the Train, and Alex, was Spiderman. It was unbearably cold and miserable, but the kids still managed to have a great time.
Dad would would have laughed because we were having all this fun in the cold, rain.
I think about him everyday...wondering what he's up to. I still wonder if he is okay. My faith has really been tested throughout this whole ordeal. I am ashamed to admit, that I am slowly drifting away...asking questions...wanting signs. I just need to know Dad's okay.
I know this is something that Dad would not appreciate hearing. He raised us to be good Catholics. I have good morals, values, etc...but I just can't explain why I am questioning different parts of my faith.
I need some sort of concrete evidence knowing that Dad's okay. I wish he could just write me a note, or leave me a message somehow.
I know I really don't need this, but this is how I am feeling. My heart still aches for my Dad and my mind still has a lot of questions.
This is probably all part of the grieving process...or at least I hope this is.
I am not asking to feel this way-especially about my faith.
One other thing-I am angry that people take their parents for granted. It angers me that my Dad is not hear anymore, and when I hear people complain about their Mom or Dad...I just tell them-you don't know how lucky you are to have that person still here.
Life does seem a little unfair, even though-I know...that's how the ball rolls...when it's your time...it's your time.
Time might help me understand and heal-I know, but his whole deal is too fresh, and too real.
In any case, that's where I am at now. A reassuring note from the other day-my 4 year old said, "Mom, did you see Grandpa Sheahen?? He was hanging upside down in the clouds??" I almost fell over-because who knows...maybe he really saw him.
I responded calmly, "You are right, Alex, Grandpa is in Heaven now." And-I continued on with my day-wiping a tear from my eye.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Saturday, October 11, 2008
Wishing you were here!
Ok so the CUBS are out of the Playoffs, the economy sucks, and it's almost time to vote again. All things I would love to hear my Dad talk about right now. I have also started painting my basement-Dad, I would love to have you come over and watch :)
UGH! Still sad, and angry, that you are gone. I know it has not been that long...
I am having plenty of reminders though...
The other day, I saw his car at my Mom's, and I could still picture him leaning against it having a moe.
I see your clothing and belongings everyday-I am still not quite ready to get rid of things. Sometimes my kids wear your hats or sunglasses around the house. Alex loves digging though Grandpa's treasures.
I ran in to Carol (his girlfriend) at Kohls the other day-during on of the Cubs playoff games-and she had a Cubs shirt on. We hugged and talked for a bit. Then, I went to the van and cried.
I have been doing better, and have not been so emotional, but some things just have that effect. Sometimes, just a simple hymn in church brings me to tears.
One more thing... Katy got pulled over for speeding when we left Mom's today-and yes, she didn't get a ticket. I know, my Dad would just laugh.
UGH! Still sad, and angry, that you are gone. I know it has not been that long...
I am having plenty of reminders though...
The other day, I saw his car at my Mom's, and I could still picture him leaning against it having a moe.
I see your clothing and belongings everyday-I am still not quite ready to get rid of things. Sometimes my kids wear your hats or sunglasses around the house. Alex loves digging though Grandpa's treasures.
I ran in to Carol (his girlfriend) at Kohls the other day-during on of the Cubs playoff games-and she had a Cubs shirt on. We hugged and talked for a bit. Then, I went to the van and cried.
I have been doing better, and have not been so emotional, but some things just have that effect. Sometimes, just a simple hymn in church brings me to tears.
One more thing... Katy got pulled over for speeding when we left Mom's today-and yes, she didn't get a ticket. I know, my Dad would just laugh.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
1 month ago
What a month!
After the funeral...I told myself...life will go on without Dad, but it will never be the same. I can go on, and will go on, and grow from this experience.
It's been difficult at times...
Hearing my oldest son tell people that his Grandpa has died. Cleaning out Dad's room-the second hardest thing I have ever done, since saying goodbye to my Dad.
Did you know...my Dad had over 20 Cubs shirts??? Tons of golf polos..some with little to no wear! I was impressed to even find some dress shirts and ties! We had some nice laughs going though the items.
Going through everything that he saved was a task-in fact...I have 3 bins in my garage that I still need to look through. Believe it or not, the hardest thing for me to see was his calendar. Although it did not always appear that way-he was organized.
It was hard for me to look through his calendar at all the dates he has already had plans on...games to referee, umpire, watch, meetings to attend, etc. I realized that he was not done with life in so many ways...he has so many plans! He had these plans: work, games, etc...but even more importantly, he looked forward to continually being there for us-his family, and those he cared about the most.
I has been a month...
I know now that...
The thank you notes are written, no more sympathy cards in the mail, no more phone calls showing concern, not too many people still ask about Dad...people are moving on. Most people probably moved on-right after the funeral. I am not saying this in a bad or cold way. I am just trying to state a fact. Everyone grieves in their own way. I am sure people are still thinking of him, and us.
We just have the daily reminder-I see his picture in my living room, the cross from his casket, hanging in my house...etc.
Alex, my 4 year old has been wearing one of his Chicago Bears baseball hats...and a pair of his sunglasses! Everywhere he goes-someone comments on that darn hat! "OH little by, how can you be a Bears Fan?" I just have to laugh...he has no clue...and just responds...it was my Grandpa Sheahen's hat...he's in Heaven and he gave it to me.
The truth is I am still sad-and will miss my Dad forever!
We made a special trip to Wrigley field last Sunday, just for our Dad.
The Cubs game some friends of mine sent us too on Sunday afternoon-provided me with a great sense of closure and peace! This gift of generosity was just what we needed! We are so greatful we had this opportunity. We sat together as sibblings and laughed, talked, and joke, in honor of our father. I will be forever thankful for this memorable day!
I saw so many things that reminded me of Dad-even the Albert Pujols joke my husband told my Dad while he was in the hospital that made him laugh so hard ;) Even dealing with all this, Dad laughed at this joke.
Riding the train from Skokie...lots of time to think about Dad and his love for the Cubs. Even my phone call to Sam-and he informed me he was having lunch at the Oasis-which Dad would say was way to expensive to eat at!
My siblings and I had a great time at the game-we were able to bring our spouses too-and Sam brought a buddy with him, which was very nice too.
One month ago today, Dad passed away. It's hard to believe it's been a month. They say time heals...I believe that.
Dad,
I am sorry about this situation, circumstance, and outcome. I never in a million years thought I would be writing this blog about you. You meant more than words can say to me, and a lot of people.
Your kids miss you. Your grandkids miss you. Carol and Mom misses you! YOUR ENTIRE family misses you.
Rest assured that you will never be forgotten. Your words and wisdom will be with us always!
WE LOVE YOU!
After the funeral...I told myself...life will go on without Dad, but it will never be the same. I can go on, and will go on, and grow from this experience.
It's been difficult at times...
Hearing my oldest son tell people that his Grandpa has died. Cleaning out Dad's room-the second hardest thing I have ever done, since saying goodbye to my Dad.
Did you know...my Dad had over 20 Cubs shirts??? Tons of golf polos..some with little to no wear! I was impressed to even find some dress shirts and ties! We had some nice laughs going though the items.
Going through everything that he saved was a task-in fact...I have 3 bins in my garage that I still need to look through. Believe it or not, the hardest thing for me to see was his calendar. Although it did not always appear that way-he was organized.
It was hard for me to look through his calendar at all the dates he has already had plans on...games to referee, umpire, watch, meetings to attend, etc. I realized that he was not done with life in so many ways...he has so many plans! He had these plans: work, games, etc...but even more importantly, he looked forward to continually being there for us-his family, and those he cared about the most.
I has been a month...
I know now that...
The thank you notes are written, no more sympathy cards in the mail, no more phone calls showing concern, not too many people still ask about Dad...people are moving on. Most people probably moved on-right after the funeral. I am not saying this in a bad or cold way. I am just trying to state a fact. Everyone grieves in their own way. I am sure people are still thinking of him, and us.
We just have the daily reminder-I see his picture in my living room, the cross from his casket, hanging in my house...etc.
Alex, my 4 year old has been wearing one of his Chicago Bears baseball hats...and a pair of his sunglasses! Everywhere he goes-someone comments on that darn hat! "OH little by, how can you be a Bears Fan?" I just have to laugh...he has no clue...and just responds...it was my Grandpa Sheahen's hat...he's in Heaven and he gave it to me.
The truth is I am still sad-and will miss my Dad forever!
We made a special trip to Wrigley field last Sunday, just for our Dad.
The Cubs game some friends of mine sent us too on Sunday afternoon-provided me with a great sense of closure and peace! This gift of generosity was just what we needed! We are so greatful we had this opportunity. We sat together as sibblings and laughed, talked, and joke, in honor of our father. I will be forever thankful for this memorable day!
I saw so many things that reminded me of Dad-even the Albert Pujols joke my husband told my Dad while he was in the hospital that made him laugh so hard ;) Even dealing with all this, Dad laughed at this joke.
Riding the train from Skokie...lots of time to think about Dad and his love for the Cubs. Even my phone call to Sam-and he informed me he was having lunch at the Oasis-which Dad would say was way to expensive to eat at!
My siblings and I had a great time at the game-we were able to bring our spouses too-and Sam brought a buddy with him, which was very nice too.
One month ago today, Dad passed away. It's hard to believe it's been a month. They say time heals...I believe that.
Dad,
I am sorry about this situation, circumstance, and outcome. I never in a million years thought I would be writing this blog about you. You meant more than words can say to me, and a lot of people.
Your kids miss you. Your grandkids miss you. Carol and Mom misses you! YOUR ENTIRE family misses you.
Rest assured that you will never be forgotten. Your words and wisdom will be with us always!
WE LOVE YOU!
Thursday, August 28, 2008
Funeral and Festivities!
First off, a big huge thank you goes out to ALL who were a part of celebrating my Dad's life yesterday!
The touching day, will forever be remembered. Lots of hugs shared, and tears off sadness, but also a time of remembering my Dad's, "famous-ness"
Hansen Funeral Home went above and beyond to make sure everything was perfect! We could not have done this better ourselves!
The flowers were beautiful! Lots of Cubs themed stuff-beautiful flowering plants, green plants, and lush flowers! We loved all of them!
The dvd photo presentation was excellent. We had lots of Dad's sports photos and high school mementos (Thanks to some of this classmates and friends, and Carol for bringing his yearbooks)-Which by the way provided me with entertainment to read on the long drive home.
The "Viewing"-Lots of people came-Family members, friends, classmates, teachers, some of my Dad's players he once coached, people from my graduation class, family friends, old neighbors, relatives, co-workers, even the lady who worked at/owned the restaurant my Dad went to almost every morning for breakfast in Waupaca! I am sure I am missing some categories here, but I think you get the idea! It was wonderful seeing eveyone, meeting "new" people, and hearing how they were connected to my Dad.
To give you a sense of the crowd, the guest book only had one page left in it.
Thanks to all for the comforting embraces, and words of kindness. We appreciate the support.
His prayer card had the Serenity Prayer-Of course with the Cubs theme and his picture.
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
The Eulogy was perfect! Mike Varney, you did a wonderful job. The memories you shared will never be forgotten-lots of laughs and tears! I even learned some things about my Dad too!
The Mass was very spiritual and blessed. Father Don did an excellent job! The hymns were perfect too. I'm sure Dad loved every moment.
After the Mass, we proceeded to the baseball field-where we started the afternoon celebration! The weather was beautiful! We started the festivities with singing, "Take Me Out to the Ballgame"-with my Dad's favorite, Hary Caray, singing it! We all sang along.
We feasted on hotdogs, chips, and ballpark treats, chatted with friends and family, and shared more memories of Dad. People could come up and share a story about Dad. This was such a great memorial tribute!
Mike Varney, even played a variety of Cubs highlights, over the loudspeaker as a tribute! This was truly a memorable day.
Some people even wore their Cubs, or baseball apparel! We loved the Titleists baseball hats too!
Thanks again to everyone for everything, the support, the flowers, cards, memorial funds, phone calls, delicious food at the ballpark, and the all around memorable day.
Speaking of food- a Huge thank you goes out to the Marshfield Chaparrals (and whoever else was involved in this) for provided us with EVERYTHING at the ballpark! We truly appreciate your AWESOME DONATION! This is just what Dad would Dad would have wanted!
I am sure I missed something, but will try and think of it all when sending thank you notes.
Thanks again! Your love and support mean more than we can say!
The touching day, will forever be remembered. Lots of hugs shared, and tears off sadness, but also a time of remembering my Dad's, "famous-ness"
Hansen Funeral Home went above and beyond to make sure everything was perfect! We could not have done this better ourselves!
The flowers were beautiful! Lots of Cubs themed stuff-beautiful flowering plants, green plants, and lush flowers! We loved all of them!
The dvd photo presentation was excellent. We had lots of Dad's sports photos and high school mementos (Thanks to some of this classmates and friends, and Carol for bringing his yearbooks)-Which by the way provided me with entertainment to read on the long drive home.
The "Viewing"-Lots of people came-Family members, friends, classmates, teachers, some of my Dad's players he once coached, people from my graduation class, family friends, old neighbors, relatives, co-workers, even the lady who worked at/owned the restaurant my Dad went to almost every morning for breakfast in Waupaca! I am sure I am missing some categories here, but I think you get the idea! It was wonderful seeing eveyone, meeting "new" people, and hearing how they were connected to my Dad.
To give you a sense of the crowd, the guest book only had one page left in it.
Thanks to all for the comforting embraces, and words of kindness. We appreciate the support.
His prayer card had the Serenity Prayer-Of course with the Cubs theme and his picture.
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
The Eulogy was perfect! Mike Varney, you did a wonderful job. The memories you shared will never be forgotten-lots of laughs and tears! I even learned some things about my Dad too!
The Mass was very spiritual and blessed. Father Don did an excellent job! The hymns were perfect too. I'm sure Dad loved every moment.
After the Mass, we proceeded to the baseball field-where we started the afternoon celebration! The weather was beautiful! We started the festivities with singing, "Take Me Out to the Ballgame"-with my Dad's favorite, Hary Caray, singing it! We all sang along.
We feasted on hotdogs, chips, and ballpark treats, chatted with friends and family, and shared more memories of Dad. People could come up and share a story about Dad. This was such a great memorial tribute!
Mike Varney, even played a variety of Cubs highlights, over the loudspeaker as a tribute! This was truly a memorable day.
Some people even wore their Cubs, or baseball apparel! We loved the Titleists baseball hats too!
Thanks again to everyone for everything, the support, the flowers, cards, memorial funds, phone calls, delicious food at the ballpark, and the all around memorable day.
Speaking of food- a Huge thank you goes out to the Marshfield Chaparrals (and whoever else was involved in this) for provided us with EVERYTHING at the ballpark! We truly appreciate your AWESOME DONATION! This is just what Dad would Dad would have wanted!
I am sure I missed something, but will try and think of it all when sending thank you notes.
Thanks again! Your love and support mean more than we can say!
Monday, August 25, 2008
See you at the Ballpark!
I am delighted to share this news with you!
We would like you to come and celebrate my Dad's life at the Ballpark! He would have it no other way!
Everyone is invited to attend our Memorial Celebration at Jack Hackman Field on
Please join us for some socializing and good old baseball game treats-hotdogs, chips, popcorn, soda...after the mass.
Special Thanks to the CHAPS, City of Marshfield/Park and Rec, Hansen Funeral Home-and all other involved in pulling this off!
Dad, would have loved this, and will be honored!
Please, spread the good word!
Dad, would have loved this, and will be honored!
Please, spread the good word!
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Dad's Funeral Arrangements
We have decided on Dad's funeral arrangements.
The Visitation will take place on Wednesday August 27th from Noon until 2:00 PM-at Our Lady of Peace Catholic Church in Marshfield, WI.
Mass will be at 2:00 PM-Immediately after the visitation, also at Our Lady of Peach Church in Marshfield.
At this point-we are finalizing the social gathering afterwords.
More info to come-an Full Obituary will be in Tuesday's Edition of The Marshfield News Herald.
Hansen Funeral home is assisting us with arrangements.
The address for Our Lady of Peace (OLP) Church is 1300 W. 5th Street, Marshfield WI 54449
Thank you to all of you for you love and support. We appreciate your thoughtful greetings, messages, etc.
The Visitation will take place on Wednesday August 27th from Noon until 2:00 PM-at Our Lady of Peace Catholic Church in Marshfield, WI.
Mass will be at 2:00 PM-Immediately after the visitation, also at Our Lady of Peach Church in Marshfield.
At this point-we are finalizing the social gathering afterwords.
More info to come-an Full Obituary will be in Tuesday's Edition of The Marshfield News Herald.
Hansen Funeral home is assisting us with arrangements.
The address for Our Lady of Peace (OLP) Church is 1300 W. 5th Street, Marshfield WI 54449
Thank you to all of you for you love and support. We appreciate your thoughtful greetings, messages, etc.
Saturday, August 23, 2008
Dad is at peace now
Tonight, at 6:00pm-I watched my Dad take his last breath. I am sad, and relieved at the same time.
As hard as it was to see him go, I know now, that he's looking down at us with a big Sheahen Smile!
We are in the process of determining funeral arrangements at this time.
I will post more-when I know. Thanks so much!
Say a prayer for us tonight. I'll write more later.
As a continuation from before....
It has only been a little over 5 hours since my Dad has passed away, and I miss him already! I am still trying to take this whole thing in-grieve-and get ready for the rest of this process.
Right now, Dad is looking down on us with saying his famous words, "Nobody Panic"-Sam reminded this of me on the phone. I am sure he has already hugged his Mom and is having words with Coach Kroll.
Heck, he is probably having a cigarette! If there is one thing I know about my Dad, it's that he loved us very much, and never would want us to go though all this pain. The good memories will provide me with comfort, and I am so thankful I had words with him in recent days before all this happened. He knows how much his family and friends loved and cared for him.
His legacy will live on forever.
As hard as it was to see him go, I know now, that he's looking down at us with a big Sheahen Smile!
We are in the process of determining funeral arrangements at this time.
I will post more-when I know. Thanks so much!
Say a prayer for us tonight. I'll write more later.
As a continuation from before....
It has only been a little over 5 hours since my Dad has passed away, and I miss him already! I am still trying to take this whole thing in-grieve-and get ready for the rest of this process.
Right now, Dad is looking down on us with saying his famous words, "Nobody Panic"-Sam reminded this of me on the phone. I am sure he has already hugged his Mom and is having words with Coach Kroll.
Heck, he is probably having a cigarette! If there is one thing I know about my Dad, it's that he loved us very much, and never would want us to go though all this pain. The good memories will provide me with comfort, and I am so thankful I had words with him in recent days before all this happened. He knows how much his family and friends loved and cared for him.
His legacy will live on forever.
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